1. You have so many children that it has become easier to call them by a number rather than their actual names because you can’t ever get it right anyway. Example: “Number 3…I told you to quit choking Number 4!”
2. You spout off the names of at least 4 prescription antidepressants and/or anxiety medications without having to think about it for more than 5 seconds.
3. You occasionally scroll through Craigslist for a used Econoline Van, just incase you all might actually have to go somewhere together at the same time.
4. In order to get a night out of the house, you must secure at least two able-bodied childcare providers, because you are the only one who can (even kind of) manage the kids on your own.
5. Your most common sexual fantasy has recently started to include the vas deferens, rubber gloves, a clamp, and an ice pack.
This list is not all inclusive, and I am not a medical doctor. I am not telling you to immediately run your hubby up to the vet to get neutered. I am simply a “been there, done that” kind of chick. You may want more kids…if thats the case, hop of the plane to pleasure town with out a parachute and enjoy yourself. If you are experiencing any of these signs and feel you are at maximum capacity, I will say that there is some personal gratification in seeing your husband limp around with sore balls for a while…I’m sure he’s done something to deserve it at one point or another, and payback’s a bitch.