Look At It This Way Mom…

So…something happened today that was super inspiring to me and so I thought I would share it with you because I thought maybe it would inspire you as well.

As some of you know I have a child who has Tourette Syndrome (and for anyone who doesn’t know what that is, it’s a neurological disorder, where the body makes some uncontrollable movements or sounds, such as blinking, hand shaking, throat-clearing, etc) By the way…it’s NOT what you see on television and movies. “Comedians” can be real assholes and they really piss me off when they make people believe this is something that it’s not (but that’s beside the point).

Back to the inspiring stuff.

So last night my kiddo was super bummed and teary-eyed and was feeling really down. We talked and I found out that lately, there’s been a lot of people staring at him, especially at school. I also found out that he’s been trying to suppress his tics and that his muscles were hurting. Imagine not being able to stop shaking your hands in the 4th grade and everyone is staring at you. So he basically tries to tighten his muscles all day and hold in the tics and he gets sore. Right? Breaks my heart. We hugged and talked and he went to school this morning.

But I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I couldn’t stop thinking about whether or not my son was sitting in a classroom in physical and emotional pain. So…I stopped by the school, signed him out and we went to the park for lunch.

I won’t say everything we talked about because, Pokemon and stuff like that. But I told him I want to find a way to help him. I don’t want him to feel this way. And the next thing I knew I was sitting there and basically being schooled by my child. Here’s what he told me:

Mom, I was just having a hard time yesterday. Yes, my tics are frustrating and they hurt me sometimes and I get pretty sore. And it really does hurt when people stare. I feel so embarrassed. But think about it Mom, some kids don’t have food to eat. They don’t have homes. They can’t go to school. Some kids have cancer. Some kids live in countries that are getting bombed. Look at it this way Mom…I’m pretty lucky. I’ll be fine. If there was a cure for Tourette’s, I wouldn’t accept it because I think God made the right choice when he gave me this. I think He knew I could handle it.

Well…(of course I’m sobbing at this point). We hug it out and he looks at the clock on his Fit Bit and says, “Mom…I have to get back to school by 1:25. We have a Social Studies project we are working on.”

I mean really?

I’m not writing this to say, “Oh MY kid is so great and I feel the need to gloat about it” because he can act like a total lunatic just like every other kid. But the lesson he taught me was that when life gets you down you have to put things in perspective. I know we all have certain issues in our lives, but perspective is going to be a new normal for me. Of course I’ll still bitch and moan about all the laundry but in my heart I’ll know I’m lucky that I have laundry to do, and I’m lucky I have the people around me that I do it for.

(And yes I make them help with laundry…but only a little bit because you should see the way my husband and kids fold towels!)

I hope that if a 10 year-old boy with an incurable neurological disorder can not only cope with it, but look at it from the perspective of how lucky he is to have it…then the rest of us can find perspective in our own lives.

That’s all. And thanks for reading this. xoxo

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Things I Learned The Hard Way (So Now You Don’t Have To)

Look, I’m just putting this out there. It’s up to you if you want to follow my advice.

Do NOT take a laxative and Benadryl combination before bed. I don’t care how bad you want to poo or how sniffly and itchy your nose is. Do you wanna wake up at 3 a.m. with gut wrenching stomach cramps and Ole Faithful coming out your asshole all while sleep-walking your way to the shitter? No. You. Don’t.

Do NOT make a joke at preschool drop-off like, “I swear I didn’t freebase this morning, I’m just not a morning person.” People may actually think you’re on drugs and will then slowly back away from you and act as a human shield in front of their child. And then shit just gets awkward.

Do NOT tell your kids “maybe,” unless you mean 100% absolutely YES without a doubt, not even a natural disaster will prevent whatever this thing is that you are “maybe-ing” from happening.

Do NOT buy candy at the movie theater. I know I know. It’s against the rules. But you’re already paying a gazillion bucks to take your family to see the latest hit “animated motion picture” and movie candy is EXPENSIVE! If you wanna waste your hard-earned dineros on Milk Duds, that’s your prerogative. But I’m gonna grab a great big purse, fill it with Dollar Tree candy and drinks. Then I’ll buy the popcorn at the theater because movie popcorn is well…priceless.

Do NOT clean your house before your kids have friends over. This especially applies to bathrooms before sleepovers and those with boys. You may as well just go and piss on everything yourself. Go ahead. In fact, go one step further and piss in a water gun…go into every bathroom and just shoot. Aimlessly. Close your eyes and blast away. Because that’s what you’re going to wake up to anyways.

Do NOT take people’s shit. You can still be a nice person and have a backbone. It’s taken me almost my whole life to realize this.

Do NOT try to substitute olive oil for vegetable oil when you are making brownies. All oils are not the same (I thought an olive was a veggie so…). But they’ll taste like shit and your kids will lose respect for you and you will lose respect for yourself. Trust me on this one.

Do NOT expect to have an immaculately clean home when you have kids. It ain’t gonna happen. They are going to puke, step in dog shit, play, throw socks that land in hanging light fixtures and you won’t know it until the fire alarm goes off because that sonofabitch has caught on fire. Phew…shit happens, so don’t expect it not to.

Do NOT forget to laugh. Laugh at funny movies, videos, funny stuff your kids say, but mostly do not forget to laugh at yourself. You are probably one of the funniest people you know if you stop and think about all the weird shit you do.

*Hope this helps a little bit. Or at least gave you a chuckle

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